Ok, starting on a gripe – if you work at a hardware store, surely part of your job is to assist people when they come in and ask hardware related problems, rather than just saying no can do. Surely? The pram has lost a rubber spacer on one of the front wheels, but I can’t work out how to release the pin on it. I go into Mitre 10 here to ask if they can work out how to get it off, and sell me something to fix it. He harped on for about 5 minutes telling me how they didn’t have anything that could fix it. So then I suggested a large rubber washer. He told me to go and try and find a replacement wheel. I asked him if he could help me undo it. he told me to replace the whole wheel assembly. I pointed out that I required a solution now, not whenever it was I was able to replace the wheel. He looked at me as though I were speaking Martian. C’mon dude, a little help here!
On the other hand, a couple of weeks ago I dropped my phone down a grate in the road. It would have been quite amusing to watch, getting phone out of the pram pocket one handed, while watching traffic as we cross the road. Phone is out of the pram, then catches on the sunshade. I recover it, it bounces in my hand, gone, drops to the ground, I make a swipe, feel some weight in my hand, woo hoo. Look closer, nope, all I have is the backing. Argh, it’s one of those Murphy’s Law scenarios. Over the road is a Muffler shop, so I think to myself ‘they’ll have tools, short of an angling store, this is probably my best bet. After a quick scout around, no one has erected an angling store in the last 30 seconds. I head across, and explain the situation, a short period of being looked at like I’m speaking Martian, they jump into action. One comes across to recce the situation with me, ponders it from a number of angles and tries to haul the grate off – doesn’t work. He’s off, back to the shop, I follow, like a little lost sheep. He goes in, sends one guy off for something, and then he’s at the vice, doing some machining (OK, all he really did was bend a bit of metal, and the other bloke cut down a pole, but still, they made specific tools to help me out). Back to the grate we go, he fishes out the phone with extreme care and steady hands, then manages to get the battery too. Magic! And what’s more the phone still works. These guys got beer.
People who feel the need to use their loudest voices to point out to you that your child is asleep in the pram. Yes, he is, I have been walking for half an hour to achieve this, if you wake him I will come to your house at night, and in your ear whisper AWWW ASLEEP ARE YOU? HOW CUTE, YOU LOOK VERY PEACEFUL THERE. Oh, sorry, did much whisper come across as an all out scream? I have troubles regulating my volume, as my child hasn’t had any sleep today and I am ever so slightly deranced.